I'll take illegal substances for $600, Alex.

I've heard/used some fun nicknames for Alex Rodriguez over the years (A-Fraud, Double Play-Rod) because I've considered him a douche for quite some time. But now, with the positive steroid test, I'm gonna need some new material.

10. Anabolic-Rod
9. Fake-Bod
8. A-Shot
7. Alexander the Fake
6. The Unnatural
5. The Guy Who Goes to Sleep Every Night Clutching his Kaballah and Syringe While Openly Weeping into a Derek Jeter Rookie Card
4. The Great Scambino
3. Roid Hobbs
2. The Jealous Juicer

And the #1 new nickname for Alex Rodriguez... (drumroll)

1. Needle in My A-Rod